What do I need?

I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances.  I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do all this through him who gives me strength. Philippians 4:11-13 (NIV)

I have lived much of my life dependent on the opinion, association and admiration of others. For years, my worth always seemed to be dependent on others.

Maybe you can relate.

Maybe you need someone’s physical presence to feel ‘safe’; maybe you need to be in control to feel settled. Maybe you need to have a lively experience all the time to feel good about life or maybe everything needs to line up your way for you to be settled.  

Thank God, I’ve mostly gotten to a place where I don’t need those things from others in order to be whole or complete. 

I still love my friends and value our relationships, but it’s what they can “do for me” that I don’t need anymore. I now show up to my relationships able to give. I’m no longer “needy” for what they can do for me.  As a result, I can be more present with them and enjoy them with no strings attached

This is a huge shift for me. I feel independent, free, open, available, and, of course, more secure in who I am and my relationship with God. It is God, after all, that ushered in this change. Feeling free and open and completely satisfied in life, not needing things or people to be complete, is a heaven-on-earth place from which to live. 

From this idea I wrote this poem recently and wanted to share it with you.

What do I need?

Do I need some outside source? 

Must I have that friendly voice?

To make me calm or be at ease

To give me worth or feel well-pleased

Can I sit and be alone

And do my life and be unknown?

Do I need the nod of man?

Do I need some outside hand?

To make me feel complete this day

To make me feel some brand new way

To give me hope and deeper rest

But then I’m stuck at their behest 

Today I need no man or thing

To give me worth or make me sing

I alone with God today

Find great joy in His lone way

I treasure friends and family too

But do not need approvals’ hue

My worth’s set deep in bedrock stone

Which comes from His eternal throne

No friend or earthly thing can be

What I need to be set free

From this soul that seeks great love

My worth is found in Him above.

WGS 3/13/22

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